The Power of Pause: What the Monsoon Taught Me About Parenting and Presence

Once dreaded, the monsoon now serves as a quiet teacher, revealing deep parallels between parenting and rain: both ask us to slow down, accept, and be present. In a world driven by urgency, this reflection encourages parents to connect with their children

Growing up, I used to dread the monsoon. The floods, the overflowing drains, the sticky mud that clung to my shoes, and the way everything seemed to come to a halt—it felt like life was being interrupted. I didn’t like being slowed down. But over the years, something shifted. Now, I’ve come to see the monsoon as a quiet teacher. It teaches us to pause. To accept. To reflect.

In my work as a pediatric occupational therapist, I see how that same shift from resistance to reflection can transform the way we parent. Just as the monsoon asks us to adapt to its rhythm, parenting asks us to surrender control and tune into a deeper, more patient way of being.

The “Fix-It” Instinct

Modern parenting often feels like a rush: rushing to feed, to teach, to discipline, to enrich, to schedule. We are constantly exposed to messages about what a child should be doing by a certain age - walking by one, talking by two, reading by five. The pressure is everywhere, and it’s relentless.

This leads to what I call the “fix-it” instinct - the idea that if our child is not meeting expectations in a specific way or timeframe, we must intervene immediately and intensely. It comes from love, of course, but also from fear: What if my child falls behind? What if I’m not doing enough?

Similarly, parents of some children I work with, unknowingly, begin to treat therapy like a race. They want activities, results, visible improvements. I see the anxiety in their eyes when their child doesn’t follow a command quickly, or avoids eye contact, or melts down during a session.

But in this rush to fix, we sometimes forget to see our children for who they truly are in the moment. Not as problems to solve, but as human beings to understand.

What Slowing Down Reveals

Monsoon season slows life down, whether we like it or not. Plans are postponed, routines are disrupted, and nature forces us to pay attention. Similarly, the parenting journey has its own monsoon times when things don’t go as expected, when children resist routines, fall ill, or express big emotions that don’t fit neatly into our schedules.

These moments are frustrating, yes. But they are also full of possibility.

When we stop rushing to fix and start simply observing, we begin to notice things we hadn’t before: the way a child plays when no one is watching, how they soothe themselves, how they express affection in small, quiet ways. We begin to parent from connection, not correction.

I’ve seen this time and again in my therapy sessions. The real breakthroughs don’t always happen in structured activities. They happen when a parent starts responding to their child’s cues, follows their lead, and lets go of the urge to “make them do” something. That’s when true learning and bonding begin.

The Mindset Shift: From Doing More to Being Present

There’s an unspoken rule in parenting today that we should always be doing something like enrolling our children in more classes, providing more stimulation, correcting more behavior. But what if the most powerful gift we could give our children was our full presence?

Not distracted attention. Not anxious correction. Just presence.

Presence means sitting with your child on the floor without an agenda. It means listening to their endless questions without rushing to the next task. It means holding space for their tantrums without shame. It’s simple but it’s not easy, especially in a world that equates busyness with worth.

The monsoon, in its own way, models this kind of presence. The rain doesn’t rush. The rivers don’t demand to be noticed. They simply are. And in that being, they create space for growth, for nourishment, for reflection.

Acceptance Isn’t Resignation

Some parents worry that slowing down or accepting where their child is might mean they’re “settling.” But acceptance isn’t resignation. It’s not about lowering expectations, it’s about meeting your child where they are so you can walk with them, not ahead of them. 

For children I work with, when we shift our parenting mindset from performance to connection, everything changes. The child senses it first. They’re no longer being evaluated; they’re being embraced. They’re not pushed to become someone else, they’re encouraged to be themselves.

This doesn’t mean we give up on therapy or support. It means we show up differently. We become co-regulators instead of critics. We use curiosity instead of control. We notice what is, instead of obsessing over what’s missing.

This is where the real progress happens - quiet, deep, and lasting. Just like how the monsoon waters seeds buried deep in the soil, our acceptance nurtures the parts of the child that standard interventions can’t always reach.

When you start from a place of acceptance, you parent with more empathy, more patience, and more joy. You’re not constantly measuring them against a checklist. You’re focused on connection, not comparison.

And ironically, this mindset shift often leads to more growth, not less. Children thrive when they feel safe and understood. When they’re not constantly trying to meet someone else’s expectations, they begin to explore and express themselves more freely.

A Season for Refocusing

The monsoon invites us to rethink what progress looks like, not as a straight line but as a cycle. There are times of rapid bloom, and times of quiet rooting. The same is true in parenting. Some days are full of visible milestones. Others are about simply surviving bedtime. And both are equally valuable.

So if this season feels overwhelming, take a moment to pause. Not everything needs to be solved. Not every delay is a crisis. Not every day needs to be productive.

Let the rain fall. Let the plans change. Let the mud slow you down. And in that space, you might just find clarity not only about your child, but about yourself.

The Boldest Choice: Being Present in the Now

Parenting is full of bold decisions. Sometimes the boldest one is the simplest: to be fully present, even when it’s hard. To stop rushing, comparing, controlling and instead, to watch, to listen, to breathe. Choosing to accept your child completely, radically and lovingly is one of the most courageous decisions a parent can make.

This monsoon, may we allow ourselves to reflect. May we accept our children, and ourselves, as works in progress. May we celebrate not only achievements but the small, unseen growth that happens quietly and steadily like roots strengthening under the soil.

As someone who once hated the monsoon, I now welcome it. I see it not as an inconvenience, but as a rhythm of life. One that reminds us that even in the mud, beauty grows. Even in the slow moments, transformation happens.

And maybe, just maybe, that’s exactly what parenting is meant to feel like.

Writer’s Introduction:
Ganga Gurung is a pediatric occupational therapist and a certified DIR® Floortime™ practitioner based in Nepal. With a deep passion for child development and family-centered care, she works closely with children and parents to foster emotional connection, regulation, and meaningful growth.)